Hamish Woodward

What If? – The European Super League

The end times are upon us – Tottenham are apparently one of the European Elites.

If that thought wasn’t spooky enough for you, 11 of the top clubs in Europe and Spurs have broken off and formed the Super League. One owner even said that, behind closed doors mind you, the clubs would be prepared to break off completely from their respective domestic leagues. That would mean Manchester United, Manchester City, Chelsea, Liverpool, Arsenal and Tottenham all leaving their place in the English Premier League, and taking themselves off to the boring billionaires league for squares and nerds.

So, what will happen to our beloved Barclays Soccerball Premiership once the 6 pillars of the community leave to form their own Major Soccer League

The Euro’s will be absolutely ruined.

UEFA have come out and said that any player who joins the Super League will be ineligible to represent their country in UEFA sanctioned competitions, and FIFA have all but confirmed it for themselves as well. This means that all the top players playing for these 12 clubs, like Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi and Joe Rodon, will not be able to represent their countries in the European Championships (Or their continents equivalent) or the FIFA World cup. This could be a huge blow to the Super League, with players ambition in life is to play in and potentially win if they are so lucky. Lionel Messi has said that he would “Swap Barcelona title for World Cup Success”, and It’s a fair point to make that many other players would feel the same way. Cristiano Ronaldo has been outspoken at his love and ambition for his country, and players like Gareth Bale seem to only want to play for their country, and not any other clubs at all.

Rest Gareth, and lead us to victory in the summer.

Off the top of my head, England would lose a vast number of their players. Key men like Harry Kane, Raheem Sterling, Harry Maguire and Trent Alexander-Arnold would all miss out on their best chance at a trophy with the national team, whilst Wales lose talismanic Real-Madrid-Mugger-Offer Gareth Bale, and Juventus Lots-of-money-man Aaron “400k a week lmao” Ramsey, as well as vital defensive pair of Joe Rodon and Ben Davies. Manchester United’s Dan James would be excluded, as would Liverpool pair Neco Williams and Harry Wilson, the latter spending a productive season on loan at Championship club Cardiff City, who are also owned by a James Bond villian.

This almost certainly hands Germany the European Championship. With none of the German clubs accepting an invite into this league of doom, top players like Thomas Muller, Manuel Neuer and Thomas Kimmich all will feature for Die Manschaft. In even better news, it also means Chelsea wet fish Timo Werner wont be able to play for them, as a whole country breathes a sigh of relief.

Sorry Timo but it’s been going poorly for you

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